The South Sea Sky Pirates
JD: Last time on Johnny Dangerfist:
Pegasus and its crew took off from Hawaii the next day after the encounter with Wally McBruce and his smugglers. Once again Johnny and Lefty found themselves over the ocean in the fast-moving airship and they began to talk with the crew. Tarkington was obviously displeased with the course of events from the day before, and he and Daedalus were deep in discussion about the upcoming plan of action. Jeffries had replaced the fuel pump and the reactor was working like new. As the Pegasus sped towards China, another series of exciting things would overtake our heroes. But what would a boy-adventurer be without his adventures?
(zeppelin flying sounds)
CT: Look Daedalus, im really sorry bout what happened back at the islands. I should have been more careful. I still don’t think we’ve seen the last of McBruce either.
D: Its alright Coyne, its not like we haven’t been in a scrape like that before.
CT: True that. Remember that time with the Zulu chieftain and that stupid cow? I thought we were done for that time.
D: Hahaha ah yes, and then there was the time Flex had the janissaries chasing us in Ankara.
FB: You mean the ones I chased back to the palace later?
CT: Where did you find that machine gun anyways??
FB: I think it was on a biplane on the tarmac. It looked handy so I nabbed it.
D: You are truly ludicrous Flex but im glad to have you along.
Jeffries: good morning captain! Everythings running smoothly back aft. New fuel pump is a beautiful little one, old girl’s taken a right good liking to her.
D: Very well Jeffries.
Lefty: Who’s a girl Jeffries? I thought Daedalus didn’t allow girls on board?
JD: He’s talking about the zeppelin Lefty. He’s a little weird if you hadn’t noticed.
Jeffries: This is a grownup conversation lads, why don't you go practice your caligraphy.
Johnny: Lefty doesn't know how to write, he's left handed
Jeffries: Well then why don't you teach him!
Johnny: All our pencils are broken. And our sharpener is broken!
Jeffries: Well why don't you too boys go play some jacks.
Lefty: Oh boy jacks! I love jacks! cmon Johnny!
JD: OH alright lefty.
D: Well lets get back to business and plot our course of action. Right now where about here, about to enter Japanese airspace. Im thinking we fly to Shanghai and then Bombay after Kyoto. We should be able to do that no problem. From Bombay it’s a quick jump to Arabia and then Istanbul, where we can
CT: You mean Cairo.
D: What? Why Coyne?
CT: Well its like I told you Daedalus, no one flies over Turkey except the Turks. Its damned unfriendly of them too if you ask me.
Jeffries: He’s right Capn. Those Turks have taken a right poor liking to strangers.
FB: To hell with em Daedalus! We both know we have to go to Istanbul. (pounding fist)
D: Flex, while I agree, I am pretty sure your reasons are entirely different from mine.
FB: That’s irrelevant. Besides, you know Carmen is there.
CT: Oh good lord. You cant be serious Flex? Daedalus? YOU are going to let a woman drag into back to Turkey?? I thought you two were through!
D: Its complicated.
CT: Complicated?!? No, getting tortured in a Turkish prison in complicated, those bastards are creative. That damned devious wench of yours can meet us in Cairo if she wants. Besides Jacques should be there too.
D: Well we do need Jacques, I have a feeling things are doing to get a bit dicey when we reach the Mediterranean. I would be surprised if the Kaiser didn’t try to pull something.
FB: Hah! Id like to see those Hun bastards try and stop and us!
D: Well regardless, we need to go to Istanbul. Theres no way around it. Coyne, we can leave you in Cairo if you want, or Baghdad.
CT: Oh tits and chocolates Daedalus, you know me better than that. Im just saying, the Turks are more likely to throw their fancy flavored coffee in your face than give you a welcome and pass the hookah pipe. As for Flex, last I heard whoever brings him in to the Sultan gets to choose one of the girls from the old boy’s harem. Heh, who knows? I might go for a
FB: Coyne, if I so much as catch you doing something suspicious while we’re there you better believe you wont see daylight.
CT: Joking Flex, joking.
D: Alright, well it seems like we have our next few stages planned out and--
W: (I) Captain! Winters here! We’re being chased by Sky pirates!!!
D: really? Weve got to make Japanese airspace! They wont dare follow us there!
JD: Whats happening captain? ……
Japanese guy: Oh Johnny Thundaface boy adventurer, and the gweat captain Day-dah-wus
Daudelus: Leutenent, we need to see Professor Meriweather right away.
Japanese guy: Right this way, captain Daydawus!
Meriweather: Oh welcome to my lab , I’m glad you came. I heard about the race over the wireless, they don’t let me outside.
Daedelus: We need you to outfit our zeppelin, needs to be battle, weve got Brazilian Sky Pirates on us.
Meriweather: I think I know just the things. Oh! Well we’ve been working on this new 40 mm antiaircraft gun plus we’ve got the new 50 cal’s and some 20mm stuff. Oh and I have this new canning device that could
Daedelus: Sounds like it’ll do the trick. Merriweather, I need you on the Pegasus.
Meriweather: I’d would love to Daedelus, trouble is, these damn Japs have me on a pretty short leash, can’t hardly go out for sushi without a government escort.
Daedelus: Well that’s damned unlucky, lets get the zeppelin outfitted.
Johnny: Wow! There you have a lot of nifty stuff Mr. Meriweather
Dadelus: That’s Professor Meriweather Johnny
Johnny: You seem really good with mechanical stuff, could you fix my pencil sharpener?
Meriweather: Well I don’t know that I have time right now, but I might be able to offer you a replacement.
JD: Really? What kind? Mine was a pretty nice one my mom gave me,
M: Hmm, cant top that, but I have this combination pencil sharpener flare gun I made last month during a lunch break.
JD: That sounds dangerous
M: Indeed! It would be quite dangerous in the hands one of my asian assistants, but you’re a boy adventurer!
Lefty: What about me?
M: Why not? Youre just a kid, what harm could there be?
Cut scene to bar
FB: Any luck so far Coyne?
CT: Damned if Ive found anything. These bloody japs only talk about sumo wrestling and geisha girls. Five bars, five failures. Id say just one more and then we call it quits.
FB: Im with ya Coyne. These durned Chinamen are just plain a nuisance.
CT: Theyre Japanese Flex, please. Gotta say this sake stuff is pretty good though. Might as well tally up a few business expenses eh?
FB: I like youre style coyne. This place looks promising. Lets go get drunk.
CT: Right o!
Waiter – Wat can I get fow you gentlemennn
CT: 6 heated sakes please.
FB: Good call.
CT: Thanks Flex. Hey, these two blokes seem odd to you?
FB: Yea, theyre the only gents in here don’t smell like chinamen.
CT: Damnit, its japs Flex.
CT: No, but listen, theyre talking about the race…..
B1: You hear that Pegasus landed here today?
B2: I did, that only puts them about a day behind Wotansraven. I think Pegasus got caught in that storm near Hawaii.
B1: Yea, but Wotansraven is holed in Bangkok with some sort of diplomatic delay. I hear Bettington had something to do with it – called in a favor with the Thai foreign minister or something.
B2: Trying to keep the race close I suppose. You know things could get a bit sticky when they hit Europe. The Kaiser’s not too keen on the Firm. Not sure that Yank captain on Pegasus is either.
B1: Well its only natural, with his dead son and all. You know the story with Bettington and all, the French Alps explosion.
B2: quite right quite right.
B1: Bettington made out good on that race too…funny how things work out.
B2: indeed, well you know bettington has this worked pretty well too, got an inside man on both sides
FB: Why that son of a bitch.
CT: Steady Flex, we don’t want to give anything away.
FB: But that lousy, good for nothing, son of a
JD: THERE YOU TWO ARE!!! Weve been looking all over town for you!
D: Lets go men, back to the zeppelin.
CT: Quick Flex lets go before these chaps get wise.
FB: BUT BUT I WANNA POUND SOMEBODY!
CT: I know you Flex, but lets save it for later shall we?
FB: Fine, but you better clear my path of chinamen or they wont know what hit em.
(Back at the zeppelin)
M: Well Daedalus, the overhaul is good and done! By the way, took the liberty of installing a few other gadgets that might come in handy on your great race! Im sure you’ll find them. Oh, and the weapons are all set too. Good stores of ammunition and of course, my signature warrantee.
D: Excellent Merriweather. Good work, still sure you cant join us?
M: Yes yes, im afraid so. I even filled out a permission form. Which was denied before I submitted it.
JD: Thanks for the pencil sharpener professor!
M: Of course my boy! Of course! Im sure it will be quite ..illuminating!!
CT: Illuminating? Pencil sharpener? Any idea Flex?
FB: you got me, coyne, but then again, who woulda thought room humidifier and rocket launcher?
CT: True that, truee that.
JD: Captain! We need to go! Jeffries said hes getting impatient to heat things up with the boiler.
Lefty: Oooh boy!!!
D: Well, Barnaby. Its time we go. There are Huns to catch and races to win.
M: And sky pirates to blast!
D: Give my regards to the emperor! And tell him he’s an ass for not letting you come!
M: Oh oh I will indeed! Good luck and good shooting!
Gives pencil sharpener flare gun.
MCM: Kyoto 20 miles out captain! (I)
D: Roger that. (I)
D:(R) Come in Kyoto, this is the Captain Daedalus on zeppelin Pegasus. Request clearance for landing.
K (R) Woger Captan Day-da-wus. You a kweyed for wanding!
D: (R) Thank you Kyoto.
K(R) No! Tank you! Captan Day-da-wus. Welcome to Japan!
D: (I) Johnny, Lefty, get back up here!
JD: (I) aye aye captain!
Boys: Were back!
D: Great. Now we need find Merriweather as fast as possible. Wotansraven is probably already ahead of us, although we dont if they got caught in the storm.
CT: I think Merriweather has his facility outside town, near the military aerodrome.
Johnny: Who is this Mr. Merriweather person anyways?
D: Professor Merriweather, Johnny. He was our resident tinkerer.
Jeffries: You mean our resident nut-job.
CT: HE DID always have a propensity for rather odd gadgets. Remember that room humidifier slash rocket launcher he built for the Canadians?
FB: Haha I remember I blew up a caribou in the Yukon with that. It was great too because it was really dry in that bunker. Pity he wasted so much time on that amphibious bicycle though, I always did think it was a kinda neat idea.
D: Thank you for that wonderful anecdote Flex. Heres the zeppelin port. Im putting her down.
J: Well, its about time I go back and keep her good and lubed! (door closes)
JD: Mr. Jeffries is such a thorough engineer!
CT: Oh god, you've got to be kidding me.
D: Coyne and Flex, you go out into town to see what you can find out about Wotansraven.
CT: Rightio skipper!
FB (almost same): You got it Daedalus.
D: Johnny and Lefty, you come with me. Were gonna go, round up Merriweather and get Pegasus fitted out.
BM (R): Pegasus! come in Pegasus!
DD: Merriweather? What is he doing here?
BM: I've got a squadron of Sky Pirates on my tail! You'd better get ready for a fight!
(Airplane sounds, machinegun fire)
MCM (intercom) Captain! Were under attack! We have visual on five planes out there!
DD: All hands man your stations! Prepare for dirigibattle!
JD: Whats happening captain?
D: Its brazilian sky pirates Johnny! The scourge of the skies! Johnny Take lefty down to the hangar bay, its safer there.
Johnny: But Captain Daedelus, I-
D: Thats quite enough Johnny, its far to dangerous.
Johnny: (begrudgingly) Lets go Lefty..
FB: haHA! This is going to be a great day!
(Gunfire, intercom chatter, general chaos)
D: Hard to port!! Take her up to 20000 feet, they cant follow us there!
J: Capn, were takin damage, we might not make it!
FB (intercom) HAHAHAHAH GOT ONE!!! Going down in flames!
(Battle sounds die down and scene shifts to hangar bay)
Winters: Alright men! Lets scramble those biplanes!
Winters: Cathcart! You'll be piloting the Number 2. Looks like the Number 3's not going to be seeing any action today.
Lefty: Look! Johnny! It looks like there aren't enough pilots to use all the biplanes!
Johnny: Lefty, I think its time to show them what we're made of. Lets get the stool!
(dragging sound, followed by plane starting sound)
Johnny: For adventure
Lefty: Oh boy!
(Back to main battle perspective)
Deadelus: 10 degrees to port! over.
Jeffries: She's running like a bute captain. over.
Coyne: Got two bloody maccacos dragging their tits port aft. over.
Johnny: Roger that Mr. Tarkington! I'll take care of it!....oh, um over.
Coyne: Come in skipper,
Deadelus: Daedlus here, go ahead Coyne.
Coyne: um, who the bloody hell was that.
Johnny: Johnny Dangerfist! Boy Adventurer!...oh, over.
Lefty: (echoed) oh boy! over.
Flex: Dammin kid, pay attention before you get chewed to bits.
Lefty: Oh no!
Deadeuls: Well dammit, how many are left? over.
Coyne: One of the port side skipper. over
Meriweather (I): One diving from above, but looks like he's making a run for the deck. over.
Lefty (I): There's one chancing us.
Johnny (I) : Lefty, you have say over. over.
Lefty (I): ooooh....over.
Coyne: Johnny, if you can bring that bloody tugga past over to the port turret I should be able to pick him off with the (whatever gun he's using)
Johnny: Roger that Coyne! Over.
Coyne: Holy shit, what was that!
Lefty: Mr. Winter's flare gun?....over?
coyne: Well skipper, tits on christmas. over
Daedelus: Alright gents. Good job. Winters stand by to recover planes. over.
(music cuts in and post episode narration starts)
Next time on Johnny Dangerfist and the Atomic Age Zeppelin Race!